Chapter 2

I was hesitant to go inside. My heart was beating so fast.

"Can't believe that fucker shot me again".

That voice....

"Old dicks lucky I didn't put him to ground". He growled causing butterflies to erupt in my stomach.

After 4 years how could he still have the same effect on me? Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath. I could do this. I didn't have to speak to him. He wasn’t part of my life anymore.

"Can't say you didn't fucking deserve it".

Cage?

"Man, she's fucking beautiful". Right then my heart skipped a beat. "But I can clearly see she's moved on".

Moved on?

"You're a fucking moron". Just then the door was pulled open and I was staring into Cages chest then I was being pulled into his big arms. What had happened to him, where did baby Cage go?

"Good to see you Ava". Planting a kiss on my forehead he whispered in my ear. "She's beautiful shame she looks like her old man". Making a face he squeezed my shoulder. "Good luck with him".

I stood in the doorway my feet frozen. I couldn't move any further. He was still as beautiful as the last time I saw him. His hair longer, his beard scruffier but my god he had got bigger. His arms were huge, his size frightening.

"H-how's the pain". I cursed myself for stuttering. I hated how nervous he made me. I should be angry at him, but truth was I wasn't.

"Got anything to take the edge off?”.

Rolling my eyes, I walked further into the office setting my kit up on the table. Putting on some gloves I hated the way he was looking at me. I didn't want him to look at me the way he always did. like I was the only girl in the world.

His girl

"Is the bullet in there?". He was holding a cloth over the wound soaking up the blood while I was pushing against his skin to see if I could feel anything.

"Nah sweets he just grazed me".

Oh fuck!! Why did he have to call me that?

Shaking it off I pushed his T-shirt further up his body my eyes landing on his tattoo. He still had it. Why did he still have it? Swallowing the lump that appeared in my throat I shook my head. I had to focus he was none of my business anymore.

"This will be a little cold". I whispered cleaning up the dry blood and cleaning around the wound. "It won't take long; a few stitches and you'll be done".

"Take as long as you want darling". I knew he was staring at me again in fact I don't think he stopped. Being this close to him wasn't good. I couldn't think straight. Why was he making me feel this way. I thought I had finally got to a place where I was used to living without him and as soon as I see him again, I'm straight back to square one.

Just as I was putting in the last stitch, he placed his hand on the side of my waist, and I almost passed out. "You look good baby". No, he wasn't allowed to do that, and I wouldn't allow him to.

"There all done". My body was physically shaking, and he had only placed his hand on my waist.

"Ava"....

"No". Taking off my gloves I put some distance between us. No matter how he was making me feel, it didn't matter that all my feelings had come rushing back I wasn't going to let anything happen. I wasn't angry at him anymore but that didn't mean I had forgotten what he had done.

"Please baby-..."

"No, you don't get to do this". I whispered. "Please don't". I held up my hand as I watched him get to his feet. I couldn't do this, I wasn't letting him crawl his way back into my life just to hurt me again, there wasn't just me anymore I had to think of Everleigh.

"I knew you'd have moved on. Couldn't really expect you to wait for me. Where's the kid's dad?".

Wait for him. I did wait for him; I haven't been with anyone else but him. Now I was getting angry. How could he be so stupid? How could he not tell she was his? Nostrils flaring, I stormed my way out of there before I did something I wouldn't regret.

With a face like thunder, I closed the bedroom door shut behind me. Jared was staring at me as I paced the room like a mad woman.

"How can he not tell she's his". I hissed. "She is like a mini version and yet he's still fucking clueless". Running a hand through my hair I laughed. "I shouldn't have come back here Jared".

"We didn't know he was going to be here".

"Don't give me that bullshit of course you did. Can you maybe keep an eye on her I need something to calm my nerves and take the edge off before I go in there and do what I've wanted to do since the day he left me".

"I've got her go do what you need to do".

And that's exactly what I did.

There weren't many people left inside. A few old timers having a drink in Tommy's memory. My mom and dad were nowhere to be seen and you have no idea how thankful I was for that. Reaching over the bar I grabbed a bottle of tequila and parked my ass onto a stool.

I just had to remind myself that I was here for Tommy. Pouring the brown liquid into a glass I raised it to the sky. "Rest in peace Tommy. I will miss you, you old fucker".

God he was some man and when him and my dad were together, they were like a pair of big kids. He had a lot of love, and he didn't deserve to die the way he did. Nursing the drink, I wanted the floor to swallow me up when I noticed I was the only one sitting when Blaze walked in.

Where did everyone go? Truth be told I couldn't trust myself around him. I needed to hate him, and he needed to think I hated him. But I didn't I fucking loved him.

I could hear him moving around behind me, I knew he was close. Trying to be the tough girl I wanted to be I straightened my shoulders and poured myself another drink.

"I like this". He whispered taking a strand of my hair between his fingers.

Sweet Jesus!!

"Darker and sexier".

He was so close I could feel his breath against my neck, his beard tickling my cheek. I knew exactly what he was doing, and my body was screaming at me to let him do it.

"Fuck you're beautiful". He growled causing my eyes to close and that sweet feeling to appear in the pit of my stomach.

He left you.....he broke your heart

And just like that my eyes snapped open, and I was off the chair and making my way to the other side of the room.

"You don't get to do that I won't let you". Fuck he almost had me, how was it so easy to fall back into how we used to be. How did he do that? "Stay there I mean it". I was on high alert, my body was a mess, my head was a mess and the look he was giving me told me he wasn't giving up.

He smirked.

Bastard.

"God baby you've turned into a beautiful young woman. Let me look at you". He began to slowly make his way towards me, and I started backing away. Our eyes connected and it wasn't until my back hit the wall that I knew I was screwed.

I was rooted on the spot; he was so close our noses were touching. I didn't come back for this, if I knew he was here I wouldn't have come back at all.

Brushing his nose against mine he grabbed a hold of both my hands and placed one over his heart and the other one he pinned above my head.

"Ava-...Fuck I'm sorry. She's awake eh she's a little upset"...

It was like a big bucket of cold water had been thrown over my head. Pushing him off me I rushed off red faced and embarrassed.

"Fuck". I heard him growl.

"Mommy I misseded you". Bringing her little hands up she rubbed at her eyes. Even though she was only 3 she was highly intelligent for her age and her speech was remarkable.

"Missed you too baby. You want some hot milk?". Brushing her hair out of her face she looked up at me with those big blue eyes. Eyes just like her fathers. I still couldn't believe how much she looked like him and every time I looked at that precious little face all I could see was him.

"Yeah". She squealed clapping her hands together. And that right there is what happens when I let her nap. "Come with you mommy?".

Lifting her into my arms I took her into the kitchen area. With her sat on my hip I poured some milk into a pot and put it over the hob.

"Mommy you pretty". She giggled causing me to laugh with her. "No honey you're pretty". Kissing her cheek, I could see him standing in the doorway. He was seeing the situation, and he couldn't take his eyes off her.

"Okay monkey I need to put you down so I can sort your milk". Placing her onto her feet I knew she was too busy staring at Blaze to answer me.

"Mommy who's that?". She was swaying on her feet, her thumb in her mouth. A thing she only ever did when she was frightened. After checking the temperature of her milk and putting it into her sippy cup I bent down beside her. He hadn't moved from the doorway, his eyes still fixated on her, and something told me he was finally catching on.

"I'm Blaze sweetheart, what's your name?".

If he found out her name, then he would know she was his. It amazed me how he didn't already know. Or maybe he did, and he was just waiting to see how long it would take for me to tell him.

Everleigh was his mom's name.

"Mommy me tired". Taking the cup from me she raised her arms for me to lift her. "Come on then baby". Lifting her into my arms I caught the look he was giving me, and I didn't miss it. But thankfully he didn't say anything. He let me take our daughter to bed.

Once she was sound asleep and secure, I snuck out of the room. I couldn't sleep my mind wouldn't turn off. I was back here after I swore, I would never return. I needed to find a cigarette. One day back and already I'm picking bad habits back up.

Sneaking through the clubhouse I almost had a heart attack when I saw him. Sitting in the dark nursing a whiskey.

"You'll find some in my cut pocket". I couldn't really see him more so his shadow and for that I was glad. I don't know if I could handle the glare. "Always did like a smoke when you couldn't sleep".

I hated that he knew me so well.

"It's hanging on the kitchen chair".

Walking into the kitchen I got myself a smoke before taking a seat on the back step. I hadn't been here in 4 years so why the hell did it feel like I had never left. The cool breeze was welcoming against my bare skin.

I knew instantly he was behind me, draping the blanket over my shoulders I bite the inside of my jaw.

"How old is she?".

"She's 3". Taking a draw of my smoke I ran my fingers through my hair.

"Times the service tomorrow?". I had to change the subject. I didn't want to have the conversation that I knew was coming.

"What's her name Ava?".

"Please don't do this Blaze not now". I was feeling sick to my stomach. Stubbing out my cigarette I pushed myself up and closed the door behind me. Jumping slightly with how close he was I couldn't look at him.

"What's her name?". He asked again.

"Blaze-..."

"What's her fucking name". He snapped.

"Everleigh her name is Everleigh". Wiping the silent tear that slipped down my cheek I went to walk past him only for him to grab my wrist.

"Is she mine?".

He was starting to scare me. I didn't like this side of him. "You're hurting me". I cried trying to get out of his hold.

"Is she mine?". He growled.

"Yes of course she's yours". I hissed. Pulling out of his grasp I went to storm off but again he trapped me.

"And you didn't think to tell me. Jesus Ava I've missed 3 years of my kids' life because you didn't fucking tell me".

And that's when I snapped. I smacked him in the mouth, and I kept going until he wrapped his arms around my body securing my hands by my sides.

"You left me". I screamed fighting against him every chance I got. "You fucking left me so you don't get to be mad at me. How was I meant to tell you when I couldn't reach you".

"Stop it, stop it. Stop fucking fighting me". He roared and I stopped. I was tired all my energy was used trying to fight him. I was pissed, I was so angry.

He let me go.

With my back against the wall, I slid down pulling my knees to my chest. We sat in silence for so long I wasn't even sure if he was still here.

"You named her after my mom A". He finally broke the silence.

Wiping my cheeks, I looked at him. This was not how I expected this conversation to happen. Of course, I was planning to tell him I just didn't expect it to be so soon. He was her daddy after all. I just didn't know if he would ever show his face again.

"How could you not tell she was yours?". I whispered. "She looks exactly like you Blaze and she's like you in every way possible".

"Why didn't they tell me?". I knew he was angry, but I was angry too. He wasn't getting to put the blame on me. I was taking care of our daughter I was keeping her safe.

"I asked them not too".

"And why the fuck did you do that?".

"Don't swear at me. I was keeping our daughter safe; I was taking care of her I-..."

"And I was keeping her fucking mother safe". He yelled cutting me off.

"That's not fair". I snapped pushing myself off the floor."4 years Blaze, 4 fucking years without a single message. I had no way to reach you and I wasn't telling you through Jared that you had a child".

"You two seem to have gotten close". He hissed.

I knew that was the jealousy talking. He never was one for dealing with other guys being close to me, but he never seemed to have any issue with it being Jared until now.

"Yeah, we have he's been there for me these past couple of years but don't stand there and act like you didn't already know that".

"He was only meant to look after you-..."

"And he did". I snapped my hands balling into fists. "Get those disgusting thoughts out of your head and don't even think about saying them out loud". I knew what he was thinking but I do not look or think of Jared in that way.

"You-...."

"Mommy?".

Oh no!!

All the screaming must have woken her up. She would have been scared waking up and I wasn't there. Especially here, somewhere she wasn't used too.

"This isn't over".

Completely ignoring him I bent down and scooped her into my arms taking her back to bed.

"Mommy who is that?".

"Shh baby time for you to go back to bed".

He was wrong if he thought this wasn't over because the day after tomorrow, I was going back home, and no one was stopping me.