Chapter 2

Charlotte

We'd been gone for a while; our family might have noticed. How I longed to shout to the world how much I loved him, how I wished I could stop time so we could love each other, so we could shout what we felt. I was happy; he'd finally accepted it. I'd wanted Nathaniel so much.

His tongue swept into my mouth, seeking mine. The guilt would come later for committing a sin, even though we weren't really doing anything, except in our parents' eyes, who did see us as siblings. His hand stopped before touching me between my legs; we hadn't crossed that line, and I'd certainly tempted him.

"Charlie, we have to leave."

"Touch me."

"I can't." He pressed his forehead to mine. Our lips were swollen.

Since he was released from prison, Mom has been doing everything she can to spoil him; it's been impossible to have any time alone together. Besides, his dental practice, which Dad had just finished, was put on hold while he was incarcerated. He was supposed to open it on Monday.

His arms gripped my waist tightly; his desire was obvious, yet he held back. The delicious scent of his cologne permeated my entire being. His green eyes had darkened after his words; I needed him.

"Do it." He refused.

His lips met mine, his teeth gently nipping at my lower lip. If this was just a kiss, I can't imagine what Nathaniel would do to my body.

"I've made a decision, Charlie, and even though it hurts, I'm going to carry it out. This has to be our last kiss."

"What?!" tears filled my eyes.

"I will not betray the trust, love, and dedication of my parents."

"Will you sacrifice me?"

I couldn't stop myself; tears flowed. Now I understood his distance since his return. It wasn't out of fear of being discovered. It was because he had given me up. He kissed my forehead.

"You'll be happy, even if I'm dying of jealousy inside, another man will come into your life. I chose our family. From now on, I'll force myself to see you as a sister, not as a woman; a kiss isn't the same as losing myself in your body. Goodbye."

No, no, no. I didn't have time to say anything. My hands began to tremble, as did my lips. He didn't choose me; the love I thought he had for me wasn't enough. Like a fool, imagining becoming his wife, surrendering myself to him body and soul, I'd built a whole lifetime with him in my head.

How does Nathaniel expect me to see him as a brother? I tried to stay calm; I had to go out or Mom would find out. It hasn't been easy to deceive her. But how do I hide my pain?