The Essence of Your Love

I hate hospitals.

I hate the white coats the doctors wear, I hate the smell of disease and medicine in the air, I hate how white everything is, and I definitely hate it here. Stupid trunk that crossed my path and made me fall off my bike. Now my left wrist is suffering the consequences, no bones were broken, but I have a tight bandage on my hand that prevents me from moving it freely.

The view out the window isn't that bad, but my mood is bad because I can't enjoy the great weather. The sun is high, and I want to play with my ball, which is impossible because the stupid doctor insisted that I stay here one more day to monitor my injury. Stupid doctor, I hate him.

I don't want to spend the night here, I want to be in my bed and play video games before bed, the food in this place is disgusting and I ate the chocolate my mom snuck me in hours ago, even though I hate that sweet paste... Mom should know by now. I wanna go, today I was supposed to confront Matthew and his friends who think they own the park. I'll show him…

“Hello.”

I turn around quickly and press hard on the sheets of the gurney where I'm lying. It's a boy. At what point did he come in? I didn't hear him, and he's carrying one of those noisy poles where the nurses hang a bag of clear liquid that's connected to an IV in his arm, serum, I think it's called. I look around to see if anyone else is here, but it's just him standing next to my bed.

“What's your name?” His voice is a bit squeaky. He's wearing thick glasses, and the sun shining through the window illuminates the glass, so I can't see the color of his eyes.

“Uh... Jasper.” I sit and watch him more closely.

He has brown hair, and it looks like a bomb has exploded in his head because the locks are pointing to the sky. He has white skin, and I can tell he's a little short. Sniffs constantly and wears a hospital gown, with hairy white slippers on the feet.

“It's a nice name.” Smiles. “I'm James.”

“Oh”. I feel a bit uncomfortable. I don't know what I'm supposed to say.

“How old are you?” Sniffs again and approaches my gurney.

“Ten, and you?”

“I'm eight.” Points to the bandage on my wrist. “What happened to you?”

“I fell off my bike.” Grimaces at the bandage.

“Wow, did it hurt?”

“Of course, it did.” I replied angrily. “A wound hurts.”

“Yes, I know…” Mutters, and suddenly the atmosphere becomes even more uncomfortable than before.

“So... Why are you here?” I gesture to the metal pole he is holding in one hand. “Why do you have that?”

“The nurse said it's to hydrate me. I have asthma.” Sorbs through the nose, it’s small and a little red. “Do you know what it is?”

“I think so.” I try to remember, but nothing pops in my mind, but I know I've heard that word before. “But tell me anyway.”

“It's kinda like your lungs don't work good and you have trouble breathing.” Takes a fast look at the door and sees me again. “It gets worse when you have the flu, like I do now. My father was very angry when they told him I had to stay.”

“Father?” I scowl, confused. “Why do you call him father?”

“Huh?” Tilts the head to the side, the glasses slide a bit down his nose, but I still can't see his eyes. “How am I supposed to call him?

“I don't know. Dad?” I shrug. “Or daddy, maybe?”

“I can't do that.” Denies quickly, seems scared all of a sudden. “My father says that’s for sissies.”

“Seriously?” I've never heard anything like it, most of my friends call their parents that, including me.

“Yes, he says I should call him father or sir.” Raises the glasses with a finger. “He also tells me to stop acting like a baby and be a man.”

“What? That doesn't make any sense.” I don't know why, but I'm getting annoyed. “You're a kid, not an adult. What does your mom say about that?”

“I don't know.” Shrugs. “She doesn't spend much time with us.

“No?” Denies again. “Where does she live?”

“Sometimes at my house, though mostly she spends it with her other family, across town.”

“She left you alone with your dad?” I squeal with astonishment.

“She calls me or tells my father to drive me to her other house, but he doesn't like that, so he doesn't do it.” Comes closer and whispers. “Besides, she has to take care of her other son.”

“Why are you whispering?” I answer quietly too.

“My father doesn't like it when I talk about her or her other family.” Peeks at the door again. “But I love Niel a lot, he treats me very well.”

“Niel?” I can feel the curiosity growing.

“Yes, my mother's other son.” Smiles. “He's your age and my hero.”

“I see.” I get angry once more, pushing the tongue in my cheek and frowning. I don't understand why it bothers me.

“Are you all right?” I can hear the concern in his voice.

“Yes.” I watch out the window and hear him sneeze.

“I like you, Jasper.” I flip my attention back to him and find him smiling. His cheeks are red now, but I imagine it's the flu he claims to have.

“Uh, yeah. I like you, too… I guess.” I mutter, I don't know why my chest feels hot.

“James?” We hurriedly headed for the door. One of the nurses enters the room and approaches the little boy standing next to my bed.

“Hello, Nurse Sofia.” The nurse puts the hands on her waist and grimaces, the boy smiles nervously.

“James, I told you to stop leaving your room and stay in bed.” He looks at me sideways, and then stares at his slippers.

“I'm sorry, I got bored.” Mutters.

“I know, honey.” Her voice softens and brushes James' rebellious hair. “But it's risky for you to walk the corridors alone, I have to keep an eye on you in case you have another attack like yesterday, remember?”

“Yes, I'm sorry.” Mutters again.

“It's okay, let's go back now.” She extends a hand and he grabs it.

“See you, Jasper.” Smiles as the nurse leads him to the exit, while dragging the pole with the bag hanging with the other hand. “It was nice to meet you.”

“Yeah, uh... me too.”

Before leaving, turns and articulates with the lips “I'll be back tomorrow”, without the nurse noticing. I can't help smiling, and for some strange reason, I wish he does. He's a bit of a weird kid, but I liked talking to him. It doesn't happen. The next day, I wait and wait, but he doesn't show up.

The jerk doctor passes by my room in the morning to evaluate my injury, smiles, and tells me that I can go home now. I wanted to go out and find the kid, and by the time afternoon falls, I almost do. But then mom and dad arrived with clothes for me, rushing me to change. When I'm ready, we go out and a cleaning lady enters to fix the room.

I try to tell my parents to give me a chance to search for him, but they are too busy answering the phone and ignoring me as we get near the exit. I check every room I can in the short walk around the hospital, but I don't see him in any of them, and I can't explain the disappointment I feel.

Mom opens the back door of the car for me, helps me put the seat belt on, and soon after that, I listen to the engine roar as we begin to move. I keep staring at the hospital until it's out of my sight.