Chapter Nine

ALEXANDER'S POV

I toss restlessly on my bed. Sleep is now my enemy, afraid of enveloping my eyes even for a minute. I stretch to put on the lamp.

Its soft glow encircles my bedroom, making the curtains look like the hanging skirts of ancient men. I move forward to shifting the thick curtains aside, leaving the curtain linens untouched.

The faint rays of the full moon tears through them. My room feels dark and at the same time, lightened. I lay back, covered in moonlight and lamp light.

For weeks, my mind feeds on unease. My pride has been injured. Everything tastes meaningless. I barely eat breakfast and dinner with my family.

Few days ago, Grandmother's voice made me stop right in my track. I had no idea she was there. She probably waited in the dark, waiting patiently for me.

"Alex honey, why have you become so distant?"

I bet she hadn't washed her mouth.

I turn to find her face.

"Don't bother searching for me, speak."

"Nothing. I need my space."

"I'd assume you are working towards being a father." I could imagine a weak smile on her face.

I keep mute for a while and then end the conversation.

"I'm off to work. Have a splendid day, Grandmother."

I respect my grandparents and I have decided to accept their will for me to have an heir. Regardless, how can I not know the one who carries them? Why should we conceal our identities from each other?

I have never seen her or met her and it gnaws at me like an insatiable hunger. I have never been so concerned about a woman before neither have I felt this type of way.

I crave to know what her life is like. What her motivation was? What led her to this selfless act of carrying the future of a man you don't know?

With a sigh, I throw off my blankets and raise from the bed. I pace up and down thinking of ways to get to know her.

I walk into the bathroom to take a nerve-calming bath. After watching the bath tub swell with mildly warm water, I lay in it; eyes closed, breath held.

As the minutes tick away, I allow myself to soak deep wishing my thoughts a dissolving moment. Hoping new ideas infiltrate my body.

My brain lights up with ideas after a while of roaming my room in towel and a wet bare hairy chest. A cunning smile spreads on my face.

My grandparents' room should be the first place to check out, for files, papers or contracts. Anything related to surrogacy then, get to meet with her through any means possible.

"This should work." I whisper to myself in consolation and sink into my calling bed, imagining what her face would look like, how her smile would spread across her face—and maybe, a dimple. I wonder if she would be as pretty as Grandmother said or, as pretty as she thinks.

Hey, man. See me at Ander today.

I grin at the sound of the sent text message and throw the phone farther away from me. I close my eyes gradually, letting sleep engulf me in a deep embrace.

****

I stare at the fleet of cars from the window. My black SUV looks like a good ride for today. I roll the lint of my perfectly tailored suit and make my way to the board of keys.

"Alex, can I come with you?" I hear Georgia's pleading voice few feet away from me.

"No. I'm on my way to work." I check for the SUV keys.

"I know! Just let me follow you one more time."

"Nah. The last time you did was a disaster." The sound of the keys accompany my words.

Georgia hits her palm, "You're exaggerating, bro."

"Hey. I'm not," I add, "And you're not coming with me."

"Fine!" She throws her face to the other side.

I pause for a brief moment. I am not contemplating on taking her along.

"Would Grandparents be at home all day?"

"Why do you ask?" She asks, giving me a blank stare.

"Give me an answer, Georgia."

"Not exactly. Grandmother said they would be attending a meeting in three hours time."

I flip my wrist to see the time. 8:07 am.

"Oh. You'd be left alone at home."

"Yes. I don't want to. I'm tired of seeing the helps' faces every time."

Hmm. I see. I need to make sure no one would be at home when I come back to search for the papers. Georgia has to follow me.

"Okay. You can come with me although, there would be no time for attention."

She giggles, "I don't mind. Thank you."

Georgia's the last child my parents had before they met with disastrous death in an airplane crash on their way to sign a business deal.

Our grandparents told us of how they told them to postpone the trip but they refused, saying it is business and must be done immediately.

I was still a child. I did not feel the loss until months later. The rest is history.

As I maneuver the sleek car through the city streets, Georgia leans back in her seat, idly tapping her fingers on the dashboard, the only sound I hear against the muted noise of the traffic.

I know she has something to say, the corner of my eyes sees her constant stares.

"Alex, you've been a bit distant lately. Is everything okay?"

"It is nothing. I’m okay, just a lot on my mind." I navigate my way to the left side of the road.

"Is it work or the surrogacy?"

I stare at her for a while.

"Both." I concentrate on the sprawling road before me.

"I understand and I'm sorry even if I don't know exactly how you feel."

"Thank you, Georgia." I whisper, blinking my eyes with an added grin.

"So, what are your thoughts about the surrogacy? Is there anything you'd want to do?"