Chapter 4

After struggling to control my frantic heartbeat, I forced myself to start walking slowly again. Being this close to Javier—bare-chested and in such an intimate setting—made my common sense nearly evaporate. But just as I walked past him, his baritone voice suddenly shattered the silence of the night, causing my footsteps to freeze instantly on the kitchen floor.

“Why are your cheeks red?”

That short question just slipped out, low and intimidating.

Reflexively, I touched my own cheek. Sure enough, it felt scorching hot—a lingering heat from the erotic dream that had just woken me up.

“I… I’m fine,” I stammered in a barely audible voice.

Without waiting for his response, I hurriedly took long strides out of the kitchen. I couldn’t afford to linger near him in a situation like this. Being near Javier on a quiet night like this ignited a dangerous side within me—a part of me that was so selfish, that desperately wanted to pull that sturdy body toward me, wrap my arms around him, and hold him tight, just exactly like the wild fantasy in my dream.

Ah, it seems I really do need to see a psychologist, I muttered to myself as I closed the bedroom door. So my mind doesn’t become this filthy and pathetic.

The next morning, I was all dressed up in my work clothes. My mood was much better than yesterday’s after trying to forget last night’s incident. However, the moment my feet touched the last step of the staircase, the faint sound of Adriana’s coquettish squeal greeted me. Sure enough, she was already sitting prettily in the dining room, joining Javier and his parents for a meal together.

She was sitting right next to Javier, leaning against him affectionately while occasionally flashing a tender smile his way. A sight that, of course, instantly killed my appetite.

“Camila, since it’s a day off tomorrow, do you want to come on vacation with us?” Adriana asked right away, as soon as she noticed me in the dining room.

I, of course, immediately shook my head without a second thought. “No, thanks.” I’d much rather spend my day off sleeping all day in my room than be a spectator watching them be all lovey-dovey all day long.

“Oh, come on, why not? There’ll be lots of my guy friends there, you know. I’ll introduce you to them. Who knows, maybe one of them will be a good match. They’re all the children of wealthy and well-respected families,” she rattled on, her condescending tone masked by fake friendliness.

“Just come along, Camila. I’ve noticed you’ve never been close to or gone out with anyone, have you? Who knows, maybe one of them could be your future husband. Just come along, okay, dear?” Mom chimed in, trying to persuade me with equal enthusiasm.

I didn’t answer right away. Instead, my gaze shifted, fixing directly on Javier across the table. Deep down, I hoped he’d speak up and stop me from going. But Javier remained silent. He continued chewing his food calmly, as if this argument didn’t matter, and my presence held no significance in his life at all.

Swallowing the bitter disappointment in my chest, I finally let out a resigned sigh. “Hmm, all right then,” I replied at last.

****

The day of Adriana’s long-awaited departure finally arrived. I chose to wear modest, casual clothes—a loose T-shirt and long jeans—a stark contrast to Adriana’s outfit, which looked so sexy and revealing.

“You have to have fun over there, Camila. Who knows, maybe when you come back, you’ll bring a new boyfriend with you,” Mom said hopefully as I kissed her cheek goodbye.

I could only nod with a faint, forced smile. A new boyfriend? I myself doubted whether my heart could still open up to another man. Because the bitter truth is that every corner of my heart has gone numb, locked away tightly for Javier alone. In my wildest nightly fantasies, I allow no other man to touch me besides him.

As soon as I got into the car, my seat was immediately assigned. I sat in the front seat, right next to the family’s personal driver. Meanwhile, in the back seat, Adriana and Javier sat side by side. Throughout the ride, the view in the rearview mirror kept pounding at my chest with an unrelenting sense of suffocation.

Adriana, so coquettishly, wrapped her arm around Javier’s, resting her head on his broad shoulder as if to show the world—especially me—that Javier was her absolute property, not to be challenged.

“Camila, you’re twenty-two years old. Haven’t you ever dated anyone?” Adriana asked suddenly from the back seat, breaking the silence and startling me.

I shook my head slowly. As I answered, my gaze quietly drifted toward the rearview mirror, curious to see how Javier would react to having my private life laid bare. However, he simply folded his arms across his chest and closed his eyes, looking indifferent.

“Ugh, why haven’t you? Dating is so much fun, you know! You can hug each other tightly like this, and you can kiss, too. Hey, have you even kissed anyone before?” Adriana pressed again, with no regard for propriety.

I froze; my tongue suddenly tied, unable to answer right away. If asked outright, honestly, I’d never actually had that kind of physical contact with any guy. But in my dreams… I’d even done it countless times with her fiancé—things far more intimate and steamy than just a regular kiss.

“Never,” I finally replied briefly, trying to hide the nervous tremor in my voice.

“Once I introduce you to my friends, you’ll definitely get to experience all of that. Don’t worry, they’re all nice people,” Adriana replied with a little laugh.

I chose to remain silent, not intending to respond any further. However, a deep, masculine clear-throat from the back seat instantly forced my eyes to glance back at the rearview mirror. Javier had opened his eyes. In that very moment, through the small reflection in the glass above the dashboard, Javier’s eagle-like eyes locked directly with mine. His gaze was so sharp, intense, and seemed to freeze my every movement.

“Don’t meddle in other people’s personal affairs, Adriana,” Javier said softly. His voice sounded very cold and flat, yet was laden with absolute authority.

Adriana immediately pouted playfully, tightening her embrace around Javier’s arm. “Honey, I just want Camila to enjoy life like we do. So she can experience what it’s like to date, to kiss, and to—”

I didn’t know what Adriana was about to say next because she had already burst into a playful giggle against Javier’s chest. But honestly, my chest felt increasingly constricted and tight inside the car, which suddenly felt so cramped. Every time I heard Adriana’s words, my mind automatically imagined all the intimate things they’d been doing behind my back all this time. Feelings of jealousy, alienation, and heartache surged again, peeling away the last remnants of my heart’s increasingly fragile defenses as we drove past the city limits.

****