Chapter 11

Naghina agad ang buong katawan ko. That's his effect on me. Di ko maintindihan ang sarili ko. Bakit parang gusto ko din ito?

"Angel, let's talk..." gusto kong pumikit at damhin ang haplos nya. Lilingunin ko na sana sya at tuluyan nang mahulog ulit.

"I believe that's my date," tumaas ang makapal na kilay ni Oliver. His face was always bright, but right now. I can't see anything but gloom. His face was stoic and was intensely staring at Trevor.

Trevor gently turn me around to face him. He was looking straight right in my eyes. His face full of unknown questions. Umawang ang kanyang labi. He crouch a bit.

Another hand went to grab my elbow. Oliver pulled me closer to him. Nagkatinginan silang dalawa. "Olive--" sasabat na sana ng makita ko ulit ang dahilan kung bakit nilalayuan ko si Trevor.

"And I believe that's your date," Oliver taunt.

Muling hinawakan ng babae ang braso ni Trevor. I wanted to close my eyes so bad. The sight is killing me. "Gusto ko lang syang makausap," Kalmadong sabi ni Trevor. Why can't you call me angel Trevor? Kunot noo akong tiningnan ng babae. The way she holds Trevor is just too much for me.

"Congratulations Oliver! I'm happy for you," ngiting sabi ng babae.

"Thanks Trish. By the way, nagkabalikan na pala kayo ulit?"

Tumingin iyong Trisha kay Trevor. She smiled as if that she won.

"Who's your date? She looks so young,"

"Oh. This is Fallon. Fallon this is Trisha." Pakilala ni Oliver. "I believe you've met her man." sabi nya kay Trevor.

"Oh. Magkakilala pala kayo? Panu kayo nagkakilala? Ikaw talaga babe ha, kung sinu-sino na ang mga kilala mo. How did you two met?" intriganga tanong ni Trisha. She was smiling but I can sense her suspicioun. Tanong nya iyon kay Trevor pero parang gusto nya na ako ang sumagot kasi nakatingin syang mariin saakin.

"I... W-we... umh..."

"I think we should go, it was nice seeing the both of you here. Together," pinulupot ni Oliver ang kanyang kamay saaking bewang. I saw how Trevor followed Oliver's hand snaking into my waist. Trevor greeted his teeth.

What he did next surprised me. I didn't saw him pushed Trisha away but I saw her getting slightly stumbled.

Trevor grabs my hand. "Get your hands off of her, fucker.' Trevor hissed.

Oliver laugh humorlessly. "You have your own date. You. Get your fucking hands off of my date."

I heard someone gasp when Trevor pushed Oliver. Pinagpapawisan na ako.

Marahas kong binawi ang kamay ko kay Trevor. I saw how confused he was at first. Nakatitig sya saakin, galit na galit. Para bang sinasabi nyang di ko dapat iyon gawin. "Let's talk," mahinang sabi nya.

Para saan pa? Eh, nagkabalikan na naman sila. Gustong-gusto kong sumama sakanya. I was his prostitute and cheating should've been out of my morals. I'm his little 18 year old submissive girl who likes to ride with his huge cock, bakit kailangan ko pang isipin ang nararamdaman ng iba nyang babae? Di ba dapat ang mahalaga lang saakin ay pera at siya? Dapat kong baliwalain ang nararamdaman ni Trisha. Iyon dapat kasi puta nya ako.

But... my heart and my ego couldn't accept that fact. Mali bang mahulog sakanya? Mali bang isipin na dapat ako lang ang tanging babaeng makakasama sya? Maling-mali iyon. Mali ang ginawa ko. Pumasok ako para magkapera, totoo iyon. In the first place, I was ready to bed anyone. Any fucking one. Maging kabit man ako o hindi, okay lang basta ba magkapera lang. I already throw my morals doon palang. Yes, I liked fucking him. I love it even. I love being submissive to him while he whispered dirty unholy things in my ear.

Kaya bakit ganito? Bakit umayaw na? Kasi masakit. Masakit ang masaktan. Na hulog na nga talaga ako. Pwede namang gawin akong kabit ni Trevor at ibabahala ko nalang ang nararamdaman ni Trisha. I can do that. But I don't like the idea. Of him going to another woman other than me.

I hate the thought of him. Mali na ang ginawa ko nung una. That's enough. 18 panaman ako at marami pang dadaan. Marami pang mangyayari. Falling out of love is true. Di man ngayon baka sa susunod. Gusto ko nang itama ang sarili ko.

Umiling ako sakanya. I smiled at him. Umawang ang kanyang labi. Para bang hindi inexpect na ganun ang magiging reaksyon ko.

I smiled apologetically at Trisha who is now giving me death glares. "I don't," I don't want to be with you Trevor. "to talk. We have nothing to talk about, excuse us. Enjoy your evening." I told him.

"No," mas hinigpitan nya pa ang pagkahawak sa braso ko. "Please Fallon, I just wanna talk..." umiling ako sakanya. Hinila ako ni Oliver at nagpatinaod nalang ako.

Takot akong makausap sya. Baka. Baka pagnag-usap ulit kami papayag naman ako sa mga kondisyon nya. Ayokong maging kabit.

"Okay ka lang? Do you want to drink?" Oliver ask softly.

I smiled tiredly at him. "Gusto ko nang umuwi. Pasensya na, medyo pagod pa kasi ako eh. Ikaw kasi eh, galing paakong trabaho. Pinilit mo pa ako dito," pabirong sabi ko sakanya.

"I'm sorry," Oliver sigh defeatedly.

"Nuka ba! Masaya naman ako at nakadalo ako. Grabi, ang ganda. Congrats ha. Pero uuwi na talaga ako, may trabaho pakasi ako bukas."

"Tss. Hatid na kita,"

"Naku. Wag na! Wag na! Paano ang party mo? Dapat magsaya ka!"

"Ako ang nagdala sayo dito. Iuuwi kita. Baka pagmay nangyaring masama sayo isisisi pa saakin ni Beks. Don't worry, babalik ako dito." sabi nya.

Hindi naako nagtalo at sumunod nalang sakanya. I felt so drained. Madali kaming nakapunta sa parking lot. I didn't let him open the door for me. I just wanna go home and rest, fast.

Tahimik lang kami habang nagbabyahe. Ako lang pala. Medyo madaldal talaga ang bunganga ni Oliver eh.

"Alam mo..." panimula nya. "I've never seen Trevor that harsh before."

Biglang uminit ang pisnge ko sa sinabi nya. Gusto kong pokpokin ng martilyo ang ulo ko. Trevor? Not harsh? I remember getting so uncomfortable in bed because I couldn't sleep. Para akong binugbog sa sarap.

Agad namang napalitan ng pagkadismaya. Oo nga pala. Di napala iyon mauulit.

"Di talaga iyon mahilig dumalo ng mga party. Kahit birthday ko, nagulat din ako kanina ah." sabi nya. Di ko nalang iyon pinansin. "I've never even see him that angry before! Kahit noong nagbreak sila ni Tris---"

"I don't wanna hear it." Putol ko.

"Owkey!" masiglang sabi ni Trevor. Napatingin ako sakanya. Parang bata kung makaasta.

"Ilang taon kana ba?" tanong ko sakanya.

"34," sabi nya. "Hmm. Getting to know me na ba yan?" tumatawang sabi nya.

"Ano Manong?" tanong ko.

"What?! Anong Manong? Me? A Manong?"

"Yeah. What's wrong calling you a Manong? You're older than me. Unlike in America we Filipino uses honorifics to someone who is older. Like you Manong," asar ko.

"I don't like being called Manong." Sumimangot sya. "So let's pretend we're in America, you call me by my name, okey?"

----

I told Oliver where I lived. The ride was so loud because of him. I congratulated him again. He took my number and he gave me his. Sabi nya bwebwesitahan nya daw ako sa trabaho ko pag may time sya. After that, we bid our goodbyes.

Pumasok naako sa boarding house. Sobrang dilim na at halos lahat ng ilaw ay patay. Binuksan ko ang pinto. Walang tao sa kwarto namin dahil wala namang pasok.

Halos matumba ako sa kinakatayuan ko ng buksan ko ang ilaw sa kwarto namin. There he was, holding the teddy bear he gave me. "What took you so long Angel?"