Like Sugar

"Mr. Abitol." Jared looked up from his desk at the sound of a student calling his name. His lecture had just ended, and he had gone straight for his phone without putting any real thought to the students that usually came up to him after class.

Jared put his phone away, closing his notes as he looked up at the blonde-haired blue-eyed girl that was currently at the top of his course. "What can I do for you?" he asked fidgeting with his fingers as he hoped she would hurry up with what she had to say so that he could leave. He had somewhere to be, and he couldn't afford to be late.

"I was wondering if I could come over to your office later for some help?" she asked, adjusting the strap of her bag as the background noise of students leaving their desks and heading towards the main exit filled the void. Jared frowned a bit, a little impatient with her. "Sure," he agreed anyway, saying the one thing that would get him out of the lecture hall on time. The student grinned, saying a 'thank you' under her breath before hurrying away. She always insisted on coming alone. He had office hours, and he didn't understand why she never came in then.

As Jared packed up his notes the class continued to empty out, and soon he was the only one in it. The silence was only tinted by the sound of him stacking and flipping paper. He was in a rush he had less than an hour to get to the other side of town to pick up Darnell. It would be the first time they were meeting, and this night would be the first night they'd sleep together. Jared was feeling something in the middle of excited and confused. Darnell was good looking, and for the longest time since Austin informed Jared that it was Darnell who was accepting the contract, Jared couldn't really believe it.

He left the lecture hall when he was done packing up his notes and sorting out the assignments his students submitted. The skip in his step must have been noticeable because people he knew would pause a bit when he walked by. He paid them no mind. He would fly if he had to. He couldn't blow this chance with Darnell. He might be the only person that would ever agree to an arrangement like this.

They might have not met yet, but Jared had a clear idea of what Darnell looked like. Somewhere along the line, Austin had shown him pictures of the young man with big brown doe eyes and full lips. He had liked that, but it was unnerving that he had to send pictures to Darnell too. Austin helped him take them, and he touched them up a bit with face tune before sending them over to Darnell. Jared bit his bottom lip as he looked for his car in the parking lot. What if Austin went too far with the photoshop and Darnell wouldn't recognize him? What is Darnell decided to call off the deal once they met face to face? Austin had claimed that he wouldn't do anything outrageous when editing the photos — that he would just clear up Jared's face and make him look less tired, but despite all that assurance, Jared wasn't sure he could trust his friend's words. Doing the bare minimum with editing wasn't enough to make him look presentable.

Austin was an older colleague that had been working in the university for far longer than Jared. They hadn't talked much until Jared became a professor and Austin took Jared to a gay bar. Apart from being surprised at the fact that Austin knew he was gay, and Austin himself was gay Jared was shocked at the range of the conversations they had that night at the private V.I.P corner of the bar. Austin spoke about his lover with pride, and it had made Jared feel both uncomfortable and jealous. How was it that a man in his sixties had someone, and he himself hadn't had sex that didn't involve a sex worker.

Austin had stuck to Jared incredibly close for the rest of the night. He wanted to leave, but at the same time, he wanted to listen to Austin boost about his lover.

"Enough about me, how about your lover?" Austin had asked, startling Jared. Jared sighed as he shook his head, looking down at the wooden bar table in the dim light. He had nothing to say. He had never dated or been in a relationship.

Frankly speaking, Jared was ugly. How Jared looked was like most things you can't really explain why they're that way. His jaw was too small, his nose a little too big and his eyes sitting low and a little sunken on his face. Adding to the fact that he was now in his forties which meant wrinkles and hair loss were just around the corner. Mixing that with social anxiety and general awkwardness Jared wasn't exactly attractive. He used to try and visit bars when he was younger, but he got ignored, or, in the rare occasion, someone would get so insulted by him looking their way that they would shout down at him and cause a scene.

It was safe to say Jared no longer tried to date, and that Jared was to some level afraid of good-looking gay men — so much so that he didn't patronize sex workers as much as he would have liked. They were all attractive to him, and they all treated at him like a chore, which he understood he was. It was just dehumanizing and depressing because he easily got attached, and falling in love with someone providing him a service was not a pipeline he wanted to go down.

"Does that mean you don't have anybody?" Austin's voice made Jared looked up again. He stared at the overweight older man with greying hair and a receding hairline wondering what on earth people like him were doing to find relationships. He wanted to know, but it would be creepy to ask.

"Is it money? It can't be money," the fat man said, answering his own question as he lifted his cup of beer to his chapped lips. Jared couldn't quite follow, so he had just stared, wondering what Austin was implying.

"You're a single man there's no way you don't have enough money saved up to find someone," Austin went on. "You're a professor now, you're making at least seventy thousand dollars a year. Hey, it's not much, but it's enough to get arm candy—"

"Arm candy?" Jared had asked, frowning.