Chapter 2: A Decision I Didn’t have to make

The conversation didn’t end after I said yes. If anything, that was when everything started slipping out of my hands.

Voices filled the room almost immediately, my parents, his parents, all speaking at once, as though my answer had unlocked something they had been waiting for. They were budy suggesting date and venues, and plans began to take shape so quickly that it made my head spin. It was like watching my life being arranged in front of me, piece by piece, without anyone really asking if I was ready for it.

I sat there quietly, my hands resting on my lap, with my fingers pressed together just enough to keep me grounded. I listened, or at least I tried to, but the words blurred into noise.

It felt strange.

Only a few minutes ago, I had been the one in control. I had said yes on my own terms, with my own reasons, whatever those reasons truly were. But sitting here now while everyone spoke over one another made me feel like that decision no longer belonged to me.

“…we should keep it simple but elegant,” my mother was saying. She was already thinking ahead. Her voice carried a kind of excitement I hadn’t heard in a long time.

His mother nodded in agreement, a small smile forming on her lips. “Yes, something luxurious and simple.”thug

I lowered my gaze slightly, trying to avoid eye contact with anyone, so many thoughts and plans were already going through my mind, they don't know.

If only they knew.

If only they understood what they were really arranging.

“Avalan?”

My father’s voice cut through the noise, steady but careful. When I looked up, I found him watching me closely, not with smile like the others, but with something more measured, as though he was waiting for me to say something more than I already had.

“What do you think?” he asked.

For a moment, I didn’t even know how to answer.

Everything had already been decided.

Still, they were all looking at me now, waiting, as if my opinion would change anything.

I forced a small nod, keeping my expression calm. “It’s fine.”

The words were simple, almost too easy, and just like that, the conversation moved on again.

That was all it took.

I could feel him without looking.

That quiet presence. That same stillness he had always carried.

He hadn’t said much since I agreed. He just had a few polite responses here and there, just enough to participate without revealing anything. But i wanted more. The silence felt louder than everything else in the room.

Why wasn’t he saying anything?

Wasn’t this what he wanted?

Or… had he expected me to say no?

The thought settled uncomfortably in my chest.

Slowly, I lifted my eyes.

He was already looking at me.

The moment our eyes met, his expression changed and disappeared so quickly, I almost thought I imagined it.

That same expression he had worn years ago, when I didn’t know any better, when I thought there was something special behind that silence.

Now, I wasn’t so sure.

There was no surprise in his face, not even a relief.

He looked like a man trying to understand a decision he hadn't expected me to make.

I looked away first, not because I couldn’t hold his gaze, but because I didn’t want to start thinking too much about what it meant.

The meeting ended not long after.

Plans had been made, and everyone seemed satisfied. They exchanged smiles as though something good had just happened, as though this was exactly how things were meant to be, as if this was normal.

“I’ll be in my room,” I said, standing before anyone could stop me.

No one even did.

They were too busy discussing the future.

A future I wasn’t even sure I wanted.

The moment I stepped into my room and closed the door behind me, the silence felt different.

Heavier and real.

I leaned back against the door, exhaling slowly, my eyes closing for just a second.

What have I done?

The question came quietly, but it didn’t leave.

I pushed myself away from the door and walked towards the window, my movements slower now, as if my body was finally catching up with everything my mind had been trying to avoid.

Why did I say yes? I asked, with hot tears escaping from my eyes.

Why had I said yes?

I wished I knew.

The answer should have been simple, but every reason I came up with felt incomplete.

I let out a small, unsteady breath.

It didn’t feel like control.

It felt heavy.

Too heavy.

Like I had just stepped into something I wouldn’t be able to walk away from.

A soft knock interrupted my thoughts.

Before I could respond, the door opened gently, and my mother stepped in, her expression softer now, more careful.

“I thought you might be here,” she said quietly.

“I just needed a moment,” I replied, still in tears but not turning immediately.

She walked further into the room, moving closer as she had seen my state. Her warm fingers ran through my wet cheeks and wiped my tears while giving me a deep smile. For a while, she didn’t say anything, and that silence between us felt more honest than everything that had just happened outside.

“You know…” she began slowly, choosing her words, “we didn’t expect you to agree so quickly.”

I raised my head to look at her, meeting her gaze, as I had avoided looking at her face for long.

“I didn’t expect it either,” I admitted.

She observed my face carefully, as if trying to understand something I hadn’t said out loud.

“We want this to be your decision,” she continued gently. “Not something we arrange and you feel forced to accept.”

I held her gaze for a moment.

Did I even believe that?

“I said 'yes',” I replied, my voice steady.

“That doesn’t mean you have to go through with it if you’re unsure,” she said, her tone softer now. “You deserve to be happy, Avalan.”

I looked away briefly before answering. “It doesn’t matter. I’ll marry him.”

The moment the words left my mouth, something inside me shifted again.

I wouldn't call it a relief or certainty.

Just… some unsettled feeling.

My mother didn’t look convinced.

But she didn’t argue.

She simply nodded, a quiet sigh escaping her before she walked towards the door.

“You should be sure,” she said softly before stepping out.

The door closed behind her.

I sat on the edge of my bed, staring ahead without really seeing anything.

“You should be sure.”

But I wasn’t.

That was the problem.

I didn’t know if this was love… or anger… or something in between.

And that scared me more than anything.

Then I heard it.

Footsteps.

Slow and Deliberate.

They stopped right outside my door.

My body went still, every part of me suddenly alert.

A second passed.

Then,

A soft knock.

I didn’t move.

I Didn’t speak.

But somehow, I already knew who it was.

I didn’t need to ask.

It was him.

My chest tightened slightly, not out of surprise, but because of everything that came with it, the past, the unanswered questions, the decision I had just made.

I sat there for a moment, staring at the door, unsure whether I was ready for what was on the other side.

Because something told me…

whatever happened next, wasn’t going to be as simple as I had convinced myself.