Chapter 7 A Moment of Vulnerability

“I’m so exhausted from hearing the same empty reassurances over and over again. Ever since childhood, I’ve lived my life according to my parents’ meticulously crafted plans. I’m merely an extension of their ambitions, and it's draining. I don’t even know what to feel anymore,” I admitted. My voice trembled as tears threatened to spill from my eyes.

“You know I'm not one for social gatherings,” I said. My voice was laced with frustration. “I find solace in books and the quiet comfort of my own company. I never wanted to conform to all the etiquette. The pressure to be perfect is suffocating – the expectations, the scrutiny, the constant need to impress. Everything must be impeccable, all for the sake of appearing worthy as Prince Jayden's mate,” I said, forcing a smile while trying to mask the turmoil brewing inside me. As I spoke, I couldn't help but think about the weight of my parents' plans.

“All my life, I've been molded into someone I hardly recognize. I feel like a puppet crafted for my parents' desires, and I fear that my true self is fading into the background. At times, I wonder when I will finally shatter under the pressure” I said. My voice broke slightly as I spoke.

“A part of me craves a life free of constraints—a life where I can wander the world freely, both as a human and in my wolf forms, exploring the breathtaking beauty of nature. I imagine running through majestic mountains with peaks touching the sky, and along serene oceans where waves kiss the shores" I confessed. My voice trembled with the weight of my despair. The thought of running wild and untamed, feeling the wind in my fur and the sun on my back in the afternoon and moonlight at night, was a tantalizing prospect that seemed impossibly far away.

"But here I am, tied down by obligations, hopping from one kingdom to another. In just a month, I’ll be mated and crowned queen. The thought of endless formalities, meetings, paperwork, and responsibilities weighs heavily on me, duties I cannot escape or postpone." I said. I felt the weight of responsibilities bearing down on me.

Amelia's expression was understanding. Her voice is a soothing comfort amidst my turmoil. "I understand how trapped you feel. But there isn't much we can do about it unless you're willing to defy them entirely and cut ties. Otherwise, it might feel impossible to change your fate," she said. Her words were a mixture of empathy and caution.

"I know I could withstand all these challenges," I said, frustration creeping into my voice. "But the idea of mating with someone who isn't my destined mate feels so fundamentally wrong. A part of my soul is screaming in protest, rebelling against the thought of being bound to someone who doesn't feel like mine. A gnawing feeling lingers deep within me, an inexplicable urge that I belong to someone, somewhere else entirely. It's as if something out there is calling and waiting for me," I confided, my words laced with desperation.

“The thought of being with someone else felt like a betrayal to my own heart, a painful reminder that I was being forced into a life that wasn't mine to live. I feel so much pain, I want to scream, shout, and feel free without worrying about anything or caring about anyone. I just want my mate and freedom."

"Everything here feels so wrong; my heart and soul are adrift," I added. My voice was barely above a whisper. The confusion and longing in my word hung in the air.

"I truly empathize with your struggle, but I doubt you'll find your true mate," Amelia responded. Her voice was laced with understanding. "We've been quietly searching for him at every possible gathering, party, and even during royal affairs, but there's been no sign." A knowing look passed between us, heavy with unspoken truths.

"Even if you found him, you would have to reject him," Amelia replied. Her voice was filled with a mix of sorrow and resignation. "They would never allow you to be together. I've always told you to break free from Bryson and Elena, to live your life without their control and find your mate."

"I know," I sighed. The weight of my reality pressing heavily on my heart. The thought of rejecting my true mate was a painful one, and knowing my parents would never approve made it even more daunting. I felt torn between happiness and sadness, my emotions in turmoil as I grappled with the complexities of my situation.

"But do you want me to leave my entire life and everything I’ve known? I can't just leave like that. They're my parents, and what about Grandfather and you? Do you want me to leave and abandon you guys?" I asked, the thought of leaving Grandfather behind was especially difficult. He had always been a source of comfort and strength for me, a reminder that there was still kindness and love in the world.

“I feel like I'm caught between two worlds – the one I've been born into, with all its expectations and responsibilities, and the one I truly desire, where I can be free to make my own choices." I sighed, the weight of my doubts and fears settling in.

"I told you I could talk to Jayden about you not wanting to be his mate and how you're feeling, but you said no, that you want to make your parents happy," Amelia continued. "Though Jayden is my cousin and he loves you, not being his mate will hurt him. But your happiness matters a lot to me too," she said. Her words were a testament to her concern for my well-being.

The sincerity in her voice was palpable, and I felt a sense of gratitude towards her for understanding my plight. Yet, despite all the chaos in my heart, I couldn't help but feel grateful for her unwavering support. "You're truly the only one with whom I can share both my joys and deepest sorrows, aside from Grandpa, of course," I said. I enveloped her in a warm, heartfelt embrace. The weight of my worries lightened just a fraction as I felt her love and understanding.

As we hugged, tension in my body began to dissipate. Comfort and security replaced it. Moments like these reminded me of the importance of our bond.

“It’s my absolute pleasure," Amelia replied. A radiant smile returned to her face as she wrapped her arms around me. "You will always be my sister from another mother."

Our bond was a soothing solace against the storm brewing outside my door, a reminder that I wasn't alone in this turbulent time. And yet, as I held onto her, I couldn't shake the feeling that there was more to my life than I knew. Little did I realize, my destiny lay in fulfilling an ancient prophecy and navigating a war that had been foretold.